Move from loops of misunderstanding and unintended hurt to connection and safety
It’s so frustrating! You know what you’re trying to say, but one or both of you keep getting triggered, flooded with memories and fears, leading to defensiveness or reactivity. You keep getting stuck in those loops of misunderstanding and unintended hurt. You end up feeling alienated, alone, missing the person who you desperately want to be connected with.
Return to feeling like partners instead of like bad roommates
Sometimes it seems like the past hurts just won’t go away. You know that what happened wasn’t intentional, that it’s in the past, but you can’t seem to let it go. Sometimes, remembering a past hurt opens the gate to memories of past relationships. It feels like those past hurts have been waiting to whisper (or shout) in your ear “see, it’s happening again…just like the last time…”
Being seen, heard, understood, and appreciated
Imagine being able to listen to your partner with empathy, compassion, and a desire to help them feel seen, heard, understood, and appreciated. And, imagine having your partner listening to you in the same way.
Communicating like this helps you stay in the present, to feel deep connection, and allows you to repair old wounds. It opens a door to being able to appreciate and enjoy all that your relationship has to offer to you. As a couple, you’ll learn and practice these skills. And, you’ll be supported as you adapt these skills to fit the true, authentic, you.
Couples’ Therapy: A journey to understanding and connection
Together we’ll look at patterns and loops of behavior that have been getting in the way of your relationship. We’ll look at how those patterns may have helped you in other situations (that’s why we keep doing them), and find ways to shift them so that they no longer create obstacles to communicating.
We’ll work on communication skills that enhance listening with empathy, compassion, and a desire to understand the other. And ways to say what you need that reduce the chance of triggering the other person.
And, we’ll work on ways of remaining in the present moment when you are with your partner (not slipping into the past), and helping each other feel seen, heard, understood, and appreciated.
Why I love supporting you on this journey!
This is the type of work I love engaging in. There is something both energizing and sacred when I can witness you practicing a conversation and the old pattern does not happen. Seeing those little “aha!” moments, when you realize that this is different, that your inner voice is saying “I was heard and understood”…when you find your way back to hope and connection. Those moments feel almost magical to me.
Enough time to feel seen, heard, understood, and not feel rushed
After more than a decade working in mental health clinics I saw how often a 50 minute session just wasn’t enough time. When I opened my own practice I made a choice to schedule 90 minute sessions. I don’t want you to feel rushed. I want you to have enough time to arrive, to settle and “be here”, and to feel seen, heard, and understood.
Couples’ sessions are 90 minutes long and cost $110.00.
Together, you can move toward Love, Joy, and Connection
Being in relationships where you both feel seen, heard, understood, and appreciated allows more space for love, joy, and helps create a healthier world. If you’d like to experience more of this in your own relationship, please call or email me to schedule a consultation.